The Sinful Dwarf

Hoo boy. I’ve always worried that my position here at Softcore Reviews would lead me down a depraved path towards midget porn. This happened much sooner than I could’ve imagined, thanks to the release on DVD of The Sinful Dwarf, courtesy of our sleazy friends at Severin Films. Technically it isn’t actually midget porn (it’s softcore), but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to take a shower afterwards.

The plot involves a scary-looking dwarf named Olaf (Torben Bille) who finds little girls playing in the street, shows them his collection of little windup toys and entices them back to his scary-looking apartment building by saying in his disturbingly gruff little voice, “There’s more toys upstairs!” Hobbled with a limp, the creepy dwarf leads them upstairs and whacks them over the head with his cane. The girls are stripped nude and taken to a squalid room where they’re hooked on heroin and forced into prostitution. Didn’t Disney do this plot already?

Maybe I’m totally jaded, but I actually found the creepiest part of the movie to be the opening titles, featuring Olaf’s wind-up toys chattering away by themselves on a plain black background.  I’m still creeped out just thinking about it!  After that comes Torben’s face.  Other commentators have noted the similarity between the dwarf and Jack Black.  I see the resemblance.  He also looks a bit like the love child of Charles Manson and Satan.

As for the girls in the pic, they’re surprisingly cute, lounging passively on their flea-bitten mattresses, arms chained to the wall.  Especially notable is the lead actress Anne Sparrow, who plays a young wife who comes to stay at Olaf’s rooming house, and finds herself alone when her husband leaves to find work.  She’s got little to no acting ability, but has a wonderful scream and is involved with various gratuitous nude scenes, for which we can be thankful.  She’s another softcore one-and-done, at least according to IMDb.  I can’t blame her.  She may have been scarred for life after this.  You even get some old lady boobs from Torben’s mother (Clara Keller), so there’s a little something for every pervert on your gift list.

There’s plenty of nudity on display – more than I was expecting, that’s for sure – but unless you’re in a grisly, fetid mood, it’s not a steamy movie by any means.   But get in the right mood to see it, and it’s kinda fun.  Especially during the sex scenes when some ridiculously mean-sounding 70s porn music comes on.  And fear ye not… even Torben gets in on some of the action.

Severin includes a little featurette interview of a cult video store owner who begs you not to see the movie — apparently he had some weed, was not prepared for what he saw, and has been suffering from night terrors ever since.  I recommend that you do see this movie, especially with a little herbal enhancement, and if night terrors should ensue, well, that’s just a risk you’ll have to take.