Female Animal

by Fuggy

This is an oddball Retro-Seduction release that doesn't fit the pattern of their other releases. There are some early Nick Phillips classics such as The Pleasures of a Woman and Roxanna that are real eye-openers, and of course there are the great Joe Sarno epics such as Butterflies and Abigail Leslie Is Back In Town, but I'm not really sure what attracted them to this one.

Interestingly enough, this is an all-American production that was made to look like a European release. The director, credited as Nicholas Demetroules, is actually the producer Jerry Gross; all the actors were given foreign-sounding names and many of them speak in outrageously bad foreign accents. And the movie looks as if it takes place in Greece, but it was shot in Puerto Rico. Apparently, at the time the only things that made money at the box office were the liberated European softcore movies like Sarno's Inga. This was producer Gross's attempt to cash in on that trend.

The movie stars Arlene Tiger as Angelique, a prostitute and small-town girl who is almost run over on her bike by a local Count and his Rolls Royce. As payment for her troubles, he offers her a room in his mansion and a chance to get out of her business.

Of course, the Count tries to seduce her. So does his mistress. And then his son. It's like a reverse Poison Ivy or Friend of the Family.  Angelique storms through the movie in a foul mood. Meanwhile, everyone seems to be angry at Angelique. Most of all her boyfriend, who seems to be okay with the thought that she's a prostitute, but not so much with the fact that she's taken up residence at the rich guy's place.

With this much intrigue and pseudo-European ennui going on, you'd think this would be an interesting movie. As animals go, however, this Female Animal is pretty tame. There's not much in the way of nude scenes. And it's so dreary for the most part that you can't even enjoy the camp elements such as the horrible foreign accents and the wacky LSD trip sequence that occurs about an hour in.

Still, there are some hints of heat. The sexiest scene in the movie by far is when Angelique goes to bed and reflects back on a couple of her earlier trysts. She grabs a Coke bottle by the bed and masturbates with it. Mind you, it's all done under a sheet, but it's a remarkably hot scene for the time. On the other hand, the one lesbian hookup in the movie is short and one of the most gangly gropings I've ever seen, as if both women had no idea what they were supposed to do with each other.

Stick with the real European softcore re-releases. Like Joe Sarno's movies. Oh wait, he's American too.

The DVD also includes "Master's Plaything," a Factory 2000 short featuring the always luscious Misty Mundae.

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