Cinderella 2000

by Fuggy

For a brief period of time in the mid-1970s, it was cool to make musical sex comedies. This didn't last very long. Luckily, clocking in at just under an hour and a half, neither does Cinderella 2000.

This is a vague adaptation of Cinderella in that there's three wicked stepsisters, a fairy godmother, and Cinderella herself, played by Catherine Erhardt. It's set in a futuristic year 2000, where love is forbidden and fornication is a duty assigned by the authorities. It's a musical, alright, and all the songs seem to be about people bemoaning the lack of sex in their lives; in one case, a disco robot is the one doing the bemoaning. What is it with mopy androids?!

A note about the DVD: go straight to the extras to play the "Euro version" of the movie. In the R rated version, there's a decent amount of toplessness, but very little full nudity, and most of the sex scenes are gone (I refuse to acknowledge the goddamn sped-up sex scenes near the end of the flick -- cf., all my other reviews of 1970s-era movies). Catherine Erhardt is cute but, amazingly, you have to wait over an hour for her first nude scene! The Euro version runs 15 minutes longer than the rated R version, but there is no hardcore cut.

The other musical Cinderella from this time period (the one Showtime aired a bunch of times back in the day), starring the cute-as-a-button Rainbeaux Smith, is probably a better movie. And Bill Osco's Alice in Wonderland is many times better than this. Heck, the DVD booklet all but says so.

So, Retro-Seduction, you've got your work cut out for you: get on the ball and release Alice! It is out of print, as far as I can tell, despite the fact that the original creators actually mounted Alice (har-har) as an off-off-off-Broadway musical just last year. It never made it out of previews, sadly.

Regardless of how it stacks up against it's competitors, Cinderella 2000 is mildly cute, and Seventies-fab, and when you least expect it you may find yourself humming the tune "We All Need Love" (When you're down in the dumps/Or caught in a slump/Just climb on a rump!) against your better judgment.

Stills - Click for larger image